First Christmas

Dexter couldn't contain his excitement...

Dexter's Senses

At this point, there still isn't much more than feeding, sleeping, and pooping going on but we do have a few short periods of interactive play each day. Dexter now follows his rooster rattle with his eyes and head, stares at us and makes faces, looks toward our voices (especially Ben's for some reason), holds onto some objects (can really pull my hair and my glasses!), and does tummy time. He also likes to spend his diaper changing time looking at a colorful blanket a friend's mom made for him. He's growing but still very cuddly. Soon he will have grown out of his smallest outfits. Time is flying.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to all...











and to all a good night.

Ben's Latest Nickname for Dexter...

Stankasaurus Dex.

Oh, My Aching Wrists!

Lack of sleep, tender nipples, sore arm muscles, fewer showers, sporadic eating - I expected all of these discomforts to come along with the joys of motherhood. But I didn't expect my wrists to ache so badly! Between holding Dexter's head and my boob at feedings, my wrists feel like they are about to break! Last night they hurt so badly I couldn't lift Dexter out of his basket for the 3am feeding and Ben had to hand him to me and then put him back to bed. If anyone has any advice on how to stop this awful pain, please share!

the Pee Pee Incident

It wasn't the first time, and it won't be the last time, but yesterday's pee pee incident was worth sharing...I was changing Dexter's dirty poopy diaper, had wiped him clean and was preparing to put some Desitin on his red bum when suddenly I felt a warm liquid on my forehead. By the time I realized what was happening, Dexter's aim had shifted and he was peeing on his own head, arms and legs a'flailing. With my Desitin-covered hand, I tried to prevent the pee from getting all over his face but only succeeded in getting his hands and feet covered in Desitin. All I could do was laugh... then give him a bath and a fresh outfit.

Santa's Helper

Much to the amusement of neighbors and passers-by, My Bologna pulled home the Christmas tree on the red sled today.

Focus

Today Dexter focused his eyes on and reached out for a black & white cow hanging above his boppy! Everyday something new...

First Bath

He hated it.

Tummy Time

Tummy time is My Bologna's favorite way to interact with Dexter. Dexter doesn't mind it either. Yesterday, Dexter surprised My Bologna and me by turning over from his tummy to his back. Thinking it was a fluke, I turned him back onto his tummy and he did it again. He did it again today for Daddy. He's so strong already - how long before he's running and climbing?!

The dangers of venturing out

I took a couple of hours between breastfeedings today to go out and get a little Christmas shopping done. It felt good to get "dressed" and get out of the house (and have a latte). I just realized I have had my pants on inside out all day...

Exhaustion

We finally understand the exhaustion every parent has told us about. When not feeding or changing Dexter, we are spending our winter days couch-sitting and napping when we can.

Healthy Baby

The Pediatrician said Dexter looks great - only a little yellow in his face still. He weighed in at 8lbs even -- that's half a pound more than what he weighed on Wednesday! He's definitely eating well and pooping out that nasty bilirubin. She refused to take blood saying that he looked so healthy she couldn't justify poking him yet again. She sent us home with the instructions, "Enjoy your healthy baby." What a relief!

Happy Family

Dexter Dewey Lansing

It's been a rollercoaster of a week but things finally seem to be settling down. Had I had the time and my wits about me, my blogs would have looked something like this:

OVERJOYED! 11/30/08
Ben and I are happy to announce that Dexter Dewey Lansing arrived at 11:46pm on Saturday, November 29th, 2008. He weighed in at 7lbs 8oz and measured 20" long. He's healthy, strong, and beautiful. Labor started Thanksgiving evening and increased in intensity though Saturday afternoon. Good patient that I am, I called my OB at 4:30pm when the contractions hit 5 minutes apart for more than an hour, as instructed. We were told to go to the hospital. For the whole ride, despite the painful contractions, I was still uncertain that I was in labor and worried that they would send us back home. Sure enough, it was labor and I was already almost 5 centimeters dilated. They sent me to the delivery room right away, hooked me up with an epidural and waited. The doctor broke my water at 8:30pm, then at 10:30pm said I was completed dilated and ready to push. She turned to Ben and told him that he was going to grab my left leg, the nurse was going to grab my right, and I was going to curl up over my belly, take a deep breath in, hold it and push for 10 seconds, repeat two more times, and then relax back into the bed. Ben and I had talked about how delivery would go and both of us assumed that Ben would be strategically placed by my head avoiding any chance of viewing the real "action". Nevertheless, Ben stepped up and did a great job of leg-holding, back rubbing, cheer-leading, and loving. I could see the amazement in his eyes as he watched the birthing process. Between contractions, we all just hung out on the bed chatting until the next contractions came and everybody manned their stations through the next round of pushing. I didn't feel any pain, just a sense that something was slowly emerging from me and I grew more and more excited about seeing this creation. After a little more than an hour of pushing, Dexter came sliding out and I heard a hearty cry. He had his umbilical cord wrapped around his neck, under his arm, around his torso, and through his legs. I clearly wasn't exaggerating how acrobatic he had been in the womb! Ben cut the cord and Dexter was placed on my chest. He opened his eyes and looked around, his tiny fingers curled around my finger, and I felt more connected to another human being than I ever thought possible. Ben's eyes were filled with tears and I could tell he felt the same way I did at that moment. When we got to the recovery room, I said to Ben that this is the moment that's perfect, that we need to savor the beauty of this very moment because life will happen and challenges will come but we will always have this perfect memory forever.

GOING HOME. 12/1/08
Dexter has elevated levels of bilirubin in his blood (jaundice) so the doctors put him under a special light at the hospital. They explained that the bilirubin is a by-product of the red-blood cells breaking down - a normal result of the birthing process. Most babies' livers aren't developed enough to break down and get rid of all the bilirubin but through feeding and pooping eventually they catch up - Dexter just needs a little extra help. They are hooking us up with a special light blanket for him to wear at home and we'll have his blood checked at the pediatrician's office tomorrow.

MY BOLOGNA'S NEW BUDDY. 12/2/08
My Bologna has been very interested in everything Dexter since we came home last night. He is now the official sniffer and we can tell when My Bologna detects a poops in Dexter's diaper. He's such a good big brother, a real helper for Mom and Dad.

Dexter's bilirubin levels are a little higher today but the doctor said these levels generally peak around 4 - 5 days of age. We're set up for another blood draw tomorrow and will keep him in his Wallaby (special light blanket). One of the tell-tale signs of jaundice is yellowing of the skin and we see that in Dexter now. We are calling him Mellow Yellow when he's not crying for a feeding. At night, his light glows through his blanket and he looks like a little glow worm in his basket. Ben's taken to calling him Captain Neon and Baby Light Bright. Between the light, lots of feedings, supplements with formula, and poops, we're fighting this bully bilirubin with all we've got.

YIKES! 12/3/08 - 12/4/08
Dexter's bilirubin levels jumped up dramatically today and the doctor told us to take him to the emergency room at Children's Memorial Hospital. This day was a blur. Dexter was checked out in the emergency room, put on IV fluids and monitors, more blood was taken. The bilirubin results were dangerously high and he was admitted to the neonatal intensive care unit where he was put under a couple big lights and on top of a light blanket. Ben and I spent the night between Dexter's bedside and the couch in the unit's lounge. No real sleep, lots of worry and tears but we're doing our best to stay strong. Dexter is doing great - all the nurses love him - they can't stop telling us how cute he is. Man, we're going to be in trouble when he's a teenager if he's already having this effect on the ladies. The chicks dig him.

HOME AGAIN. 12/5/08
Dexter's bilirubin levels came way down overnight last night. They took him off the big lights during the night and then took him off the light blanket in the morning. By 2:00pm, despite his bilirubin levels rising a little bit, they were prepared to discharge him home with instructions to put him back into his Wallaby and see the pediatrician for more blood tests tomorrow morning.

We're home again now. Ben is holding Dexter who is content sleeping in his arms. We are a happy family, dealing with real life, thankful for our good fortune. We are hopeful that very soon Dexter will no longer need to be connected to his Wallaby and we'll all be a bit more mobile and ready for visitors. Thanks to everyone for their love and support.

They Made It!

Mom and Dad Fowler made it to Chicago last night after being treated to some of our best rush hour traffic on 55. It is great to see them. They are very excited for another grandchild. I promised to do the best I could to get this one out as soon as possible.

Ripe and Ready

Today the doctor said that I was 2+ centimeters dilated and the head is 2- station. I could go at any time. Last night my left breast leaked. Moving in the right direction! The doctor scheduled an induction for next Thursday if I don't go before - at least we know the latest possible arrival date.

I've Dropped

Today, the doctor confirmed what friends at work had been saying all week - that I've dropped. Or, more accurately, the baby has dropped into position in my pelvis. This explains the increased need to pee, sharp pelvic pains, and feeling like my legs are disconnected from my hips. Things area headed in the right direction and the doctor promised me I won't be pregnant forever.

Too Excited

Sometimes, My Bologna is too excited to ask for his dinner properly

Much the Same

Yesterday's doctor appointment went well - things haven't changed much since last week and things could progress at any time now. We finally packed our bag for the hospital and got the car seats installed (thanks again to Steph and Heather for the car seat donations!). Ben and I are starting to feel very excited about this new adventure - it feels very real, very imminent. Last night we had a movie night date and tomorrow we take my Bologna to the weekly Sunday morning puppy free for all in Riverside. Who knows how long it will be before we can do these things again.

Was That a Contraction?

On Saturday night, Ben had a gig at a Bar Mitzvah and I was home with My Bologna cooking some Mac & Cheese when I felt a strong cramping sensation in my abdomen and sides. As I bent over to deal with the pain, I suddenly thought, "This could be it!" Rather than check to see what time it was - or how long the sensation was lasting - I ran (walked/ran) to find a bag to pack for the hospital (nope, not packed yet). Then I couldn't remember what I should pack. The only thing I could think of was my sister recommending that I bring a couple of tank tops. Unable to recall if I even had one, I yanked my underwear drawer out of the bureau and dumped all the contents onto the bed. By the time the feelings had subsided, I had confirmed that I did not have any tank tops in my underwear drawer. I also did not have any more of those "contractions" again. When Ben got home late that night, I told him we need to go to Target and buy tank tops - and we did - the next day - and they're now packed. Now, what else will I need??

Less than 3 weeks to go

At yesterday's OB appointment, the doctor said I was a bit more dilated and that my cervix was "nice and soft and loose". She said she expects this little one to just "fly right out". Let's hope it's that easy! We also took My Bologna to the vet for his annual check up and shots yesterday. All looks good with him but we've got to give him pills for some allergic sores that he keeps licking. Now he gets a special peanut-butter surprise 2x/day. He loves it!

VOTE and HOPE!

Weeks, Days, or Hours

At my last OB appointment last week, the doctor said my cervix was about 1 centimeter dilated and she could feel the baby's head during an internal exam. When I asked what that meant, she said, "it means the baby is in a good position and that you could deliver in weeks, days, or hours." What?! What kind of "medical" advice is that?! Can't they do any better than that?! I'm trying to be Zen about the whole thing but haven't been very successful lately. I'm sure hormones have nothing to do with it.

Happy Halloween

Despite being barely able to contain himself when the little kids come to the door (leading to being "leashed" to our coffee table), My Bologna certainly enjoys dressing up. Here are some shots of him as Muslim My Bologna and Darth My Bologna.

Riley has a sister!!!

My sister Katie gave birth at 8:04 this morning to a healthy 9lb 1oz girl named Teagan Elizabeth Rose Dougherty. Congratulations to Riley on her new baby sister and to my sister and her husband, Sean. We are thrilled for you and look forward to meeting Teagan.

Practice Session

We imagine it will be a bit more difficult with a squirmier and heavier baby but we were thrilled to have figured out how to wrap the Moby with our test model, Nic.

Where It Falls Is Where It Stays

In addition to getting increasingly clumsy (my fat sausage fingers now ache at the joints and my balance changes everyday), my belly has become a real burden when it comes to mobility. I no longer even try to pick up anything I have dropped. I figure if someone really needs it, they can pick it up themselves. Otherwise, I'm just kicking it out of my way.

First Friends as 7 Month Hotties

Madoka and I were best friends in childhood. Our birthdays are only a few weeks apart. We did all the things that early friends do: we dressed up, "ran away" to each others' houses, told each other our deepest hopes, fears, and secrets. She taught me how to say curse words in Japanese. As we grew up and our lives became increasingly mobile, we lost touch. So it was wonderful to reconnect recently and learn that we both are pregnant with our first child (due within 10 days of each other), happily partnered with sweet and supportive bad-ass guitar players, and still as funny as ever. Ben and I had a fabulous weekend when Madoka and Dave came to visit (Dave was playing at the Jazz Showcase in Chicago). Dave and Ben talked fretless guitar, jazz, and chicken-pickin' while Madoka and I shared family updates, memories, and the "joys" of pregnancy. Lots of laughs all around. Thanks for thinking of taking photos, Madoka! Hang in there - we're getting close!

I See Where I Get It

My poor mother has been trying to access this blog for a month with no luck - keep trying, Mom! We're all rooting for you! XO Jiffy

Motherhood Ambivalence Dreams

These two dreams took place on the same night:

Dream #1: Ben and I were walking down the center strip of a mall holding hands. I felt a little tug on the back of my pants and looked back to see a small boy of about 3 or 4 latching himself to my pants with a mountain climbing hook and rope. As Ben and I kept walking it began to get more and more difficult for me to move forward. I turned to look behind me and saw about a dozen small children hooked to each other in a row behind me.

Me to Ben: I can't take this. They're pulling me down. I can't move forward. I have to let them go.

Ben to me: You can't leave them unattended.

Me to Ben: Watch me.

At which point I unlatched the hook from the back of my pants and immediately felt lightfooted. I started skipping forward.

Me to Ben: I feel so free!

Dream #2: Ben and I were sitting by the creek where we sometimes take My Bologna to play. A little boy and girl of about 3 or 4 came out of the creek naked and shivering. They came up to us and said, "We're looking for our mommy". I said to them, "Well, I'm not her so keep it moving." Ben said to me, "You have to dry them off, they'll get cold!" I said to Ben, "Why are you trying to make this my problem?"

Great Expectations or My Worst Nightmare?

Ben and I attended the labor and delivery class at the hospital this weekend. I had been dreading this day ever since 5th grade when I saw a birth video in health class and decided then and there that I would never endure such an awful experience. Over the past 30 years or so I had managed to avoid another such viewing and, thanks to denial, gradually became "OK" over the past few months with the idea of giving birth. I knew that this labor and delivery class was going to set me back. That I would be exposed to images and sounds that would send me back to my OB begging to be made unconscious as she pulled the bundle from my uterus any way she chose (Yes, I'm a feminist - I just believe that women should have choices about how actively they want to participate - or not - in baby birthing). The fact that the class was called "Great Expectations" only made me angry and resentful of society imposing maternal standards on my emotions - I had no great expectations about going through labor and delivery. Rather , it was my worst nightmare. Well, the day I had been dreading finally did come and, not only did I survive, I actually felt so much better afterward. The outcome of this process (a little baby!) finally felt very real and exciting, seeing the hospital and talking with the nurses made me feel comfortable that I would be in good hands, and learning about pain management options was a relief. Only one image sent me running for reassurance from my OB that this kid, despite how strong its kicks feel, will not be able to kick its way out of my body.

Ace is the place!

Who knew contact paper had become so scarce? In our efforts to find plain white contact paper to cover the paneling and paint animals on in the bundle's room we spent what felt like endless weeks and countless gallons of gas searching every home improvement, decorating, and craft store in the Chicagoland area. Yesterday I had the bright idea to check our local Ace Hardware and, lo and behold, got my hot little hands on the evasive contact paper! From now on, Ace will be the first place I look for anything. Lesson learned.

GOTCHA!

Figuring (correctly) that I wouldn't show up for a planned baby shower, my friends at Chapin Hall (and Ben) conspired to throw me a surprise baby shower yesterday. I still can't believe that nobody gave it away or that I didn't figure it out. My boss, Rob, and I had a scheduled meeting and he suggested we walk outside and talk since it was a lovely day. Sounded great to me so I threw my hair up in a messy flip. But as we passed the conference room on the first floor, he opened the door and I suddenly realized what was going on. I could see people smiling and balloons and decorations and I, naturally, recoiled in terror pulling Rob back and hitting him on the arm. Ben eventually came out to help pull me in (he was also hit). Once I was wrangled into the room I began to feel the love and it was all good. Our lucky little one received a couple rockin' shirts (one with the Beatles and one that says "I'm with the band"), a CD of lullaby versions of Nirvana songs, the classic School House Rock DVD, a stylin' baby wrap carrier, and a gift certificate that will come in very handy after the little one arrives and we begin to realize that we need things we never knew existed before. We also were treated to a scrumptious homemade chocolate cake made by my friend and office neighbor Mikael "there's no such thing as a green pepper" Karlstrom served by none other than the big boys, Matt Stagner and Bob Goerge.

What, me? Blogging?

When Ben and I found out this spring that My Bologna was no longer going to be the only baby in the house, we began to think about ways to keep in touch with our family and friends around the country and the world. My friend Christen has a blog so I thought, "Why not?" Seems like a good way to share pictures and stories and generally keep folks up-to-date on our lives. Neither Ben nor I are what you might call "technologically-advanced", although we are competent adults living in the 21st century so we're diving right in and giving it a try.